Here is my contribution to July's Blog Chain, in which we break all of the rules to remember why we need them.

The Mini Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest means trying to write the worst possible first line of a book or story in the spirit of Edward "It was a dark and stormy night..." Bulwer-Lytton. "Worst" in this case is subjective, but florid and ridiculous purple prose is probably closest to the spirit of the thing.

Lillian Isabella Rosehem stared forlornly at her reflection in the mirror, studying the strikingly blue eyes, fluffy eyelashes, flawless skin, pixie nose, perfect lips, delicate chin, and perpetually silky long blonde hair, and sadly wondered why she had to be so amazingly popular at school and have such a boring, totally loving family that willingly gave her whatever she wanted.


Woo, boy, there she is!  Ain't she a bute?

Check out the others:

orion_mk3 - http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month's post)
AuburnAssassin - http://clairegillian.com (link to this month's post)
dolores haze - http://dianedooley.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
Horseflye - http://thecozylittleplot.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Proach - http://www.deannaproach.com/ (link to this month's post)
BigWords - http://bigwords88.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
jkellerford - http://jennykellerford.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
xcomplex - http://arielemerald.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Ralph Pines - http://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
Diana Rajchel - http://blog.dianarajchel.com/ (link to this month's post)
pezie - http://www.erinbrambilla.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
Guardian - http://daewrites.blogspot.com/ (YOU ARE HERE)
egoodlett - http://wordlarceny.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Alpha Echo - http://writersramblings81.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Euclid - http://euclid-thoughts.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)

I've had creepily accurate horoscopes before, but this one takes the cake.  Today I made the mistake of calling someone out for their points of view and blah blah blah it's impossible to argue anyway.  Like any debate, you're never going to change the person's point of view.  I'm just not smart enough with words for this shit.  All it ended up doing was raising my blood pressure to RAGE because, surprise, they didn't listen to what I was saying, they just basically heard what they wanted to.

My horoscope:

Although interactive Mercury comforts you while it is visiting emotional Cancer, your words seem more confrontational today than you intend. Your key planet Pluto is in a passionate tug-of-war with the cosmic messenger, allowing harsh words to easily slip off your tongue. The consequences of your current honesty could stir up a hornet's nest of complex feelings. Unnecessary stress can be avoided if you stop to consider other people's reactions before you speak.

 I'm a little bit freaked out.  I think I have discovered my Religion.  Seriously, I need to start reading these every day and plotting my day accordingly.  It even warned me a day in advance:

Fortunately, you are able to avoid a needless argument if you simply remember to tread softly. It just isn't necessary to get bent out of shape over something that ultimately isn't that important.

but I wasn't reading it because I never thought too much of horoscopes, even though I do relate to my sign.

So, yeah, I think that I need to start planning my days according to these horoscopes.  Like, decide if I need to lock myself in my room for a day to avoid confrontation.

Seriously, I think they sell handcuffs at the local sex shop.  Seems like a good investment right now.

On the Absolute Write forums, someone posted along the lines of saying that characters shouldn't be based on real people, they should be stereotypes that walk and talk like real people do.

I'm a real person! Honest!

 
Cue a knee jerk reaction that, Noooo stereotypes are bad.  But it got me thinking, any way.  I still think writing a character as a stereotype is lazy and a bad way to purposely approach making a character.  But basing your character after your best friend is not the wisest move, either.

Writers really shouldn't insert themselves into a story, but is there ever a character that a writer can't see themselves in at all?  I don't think so - not if the character is well-rounded enough.

This is my outward appearance.

People are tricky, complex, contradicting creatures.  I might as well just talk about myself as the only example, because I'm best qualified to talk about me.  If I had to give myself a quick stereotypical description, I'd probably go with "attention whore".  I always want something crazy to say to get attention.  But at the same time I'm really reclusive and I suck at socializing with people.  Is that description accurate?  Yes, but it's grossly one dimensional.  There are a million little things that make up who I am, and most of them are oddly contradicting.

Me as a writer. Yes, this disturbs me, too.

 If you saw my profile on AW, its got an avatar with a fat unicorn and rainbows, and my signature is similarly packed with sickeningly cute things.  Yet I don't often find something worth writing unless it's full of disembowelment or such things.  I love unicorns and glitter, my personality to others is pretty much trying to be everyone's funny friend, but I write about death and mayhem.  If I were a character, you'd probably throw the book against the wall because I'm so wildly inconsistent and badly written.

I am a character.

What?  No, I didn't self-insert.  At least, I didn't try to.  I will confess, when I began my character, she was secondary and I could only describe her in a stereotype, knowing fully well that it wasn't all she was:  "slutty".  That was all that I could put my finger on.  Now that characterization is kind of obliterated, but she's still the same girl.  I see myself in her - namely, the lack of ability to connect to reality.  I didn't even realize it.

My werewolf? I see my shared desire for the macabre.

Her brothers?  I see my struggle with sexuality, how sometimes I can think I'm better and smarter than other people, and my fear of "settling" for what life has given me.

Every one seems to have a piece of me, or something that I can connect to.  Even though one is closeted, one is racist, and one is family orientated, and those are things that are far away from what I am.

What I'm getting at is that it's okay to put a piece of yourself into a character.  There's a difference between writing yourself into a self-indulgent fantasy, and putting a facet of yourself and your experience into a character.

This book emotionally destroyed me. So good.

I've been many people in my life.  I've been an angry little kid.  I've been naive and detached from reality.  I've been a loving friend, and I've been a backstabber.  I've been a criminal.  I've been a philosopher.  I've been the girl who lost a parent.  I've been the one who will fight to the death over what she believes in, but who is too insecure to pick up a phone.  To label myself as one of any of those things is ridiculously narrow, but I can use a few of those facets and build an entirely new character.

It's not just my characters.  Take Animorphs, for example (I loved Animorphs. Okay, I still do).  Jake, the virtuous leader. Rachel, the fighting spirit.  Marco, the joker.  Tobias, the emotionally aloof.  Cassie, the bleeding heart.  Ax, the curious and intellectual.  I see parts of myself in all of them, even if I don't like it.
 
I'm interested - if you think about it, can you relate to all of your major characters, even if you have to admit it's through a bad trait?

People say, Write what you know.

Since when have you ever known YOURSELF to be a one-sided stereotype?

Time for another blog chain!

This month's prompt: Setting the Scene

Write a location description, and make us feel as if we are there. No dialogue, no introductory comments, just a location. We're the tourists, you're the guide.

---

There's a divergence along the road, splitting off to the left.  For the last few miles, drivers went by lush green trees with branches full of thick leaves, and only glimpses of a space beyond, glimpses at a silvery expanse of water.  Now this new path leads to a clearing through the beautiful but isolating trees. The road turns from smooth tar to sun-baked dirt as it approached the water.  There is a small row of parking spaces, and not another soul around.  Leaving the vehicle behind, one can walk down to the lake's shore and look over the water.  The sun is hot and bright, but a wind blows just gently enough to keep the air comfortable.  There are colorful canoes along the far away sides of the lake.  The water is a narrow stretch, but it is long - looking straight out, one can only see a endless path of water into the horizon.  Perhaps it even does go out to the ocean.

A rusted sign says No Swimming, but a dip doesn't seem necessary anyway.  A small dock stretches out onto the water.  Walking onto the firm wooden planks is like being on the playground again as a child.  On each side one can see rocks and plants just underneath the water.  They have a yellowish tone, with light rippling around them, and a slightly slimy look.  Unfortunately, there are no fish to be seen.  As one walks out further, the water darkens until even squinting, the bottom is no longer visible.  With a shift of weight, one can gently rock the dock side to side.  There's something entirely relaxing about water, or the calm, quiet day, or the warm weather.  A temptation to go ahead and ignore that No Swimming sign.  Not that a swim would be necessary, but it would be fun.



orion_mk3 - http://nonexistentbooks.wordpress.com (link to this month's post)
juniper - http://www.katjuniper.com/ (link to this month's post)
LadyMage - http://www.katherinegilraine.com/ (link to this month's post)
dolores haze - http://dianedooley.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
jkellerford - http://jennykellerford.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
Ralph Pines - http://ralfast.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
AuburnAssassin - http://clairegillian.com/ (link to this month's post)
pezie - http://www.erinbrambilla.com/ (link to this month's post)
Inkstrokes - http://drlong67.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
WildScribe - http://DionneObesoBlog.com/ (link to this month's post)
Guardian - http://daewrites.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Lyra Jean - http://lyratorres.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
egoodlett - http://wordlarceny.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
cwachob - http://www.corriewachob.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Aheïla - http://thewriteaholicblog.wordpress.com/ (link to this month's post)
faerydancer - http://digitalinkwell.wordpress.com (link to this month's post)
TheMindKiller - http://www.jabberwocky.ws/ (link to this month's post)
Irissel - http://irissel.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
xcomplex - http://www.arielemerald.blogspot.com/ (link to this month's post)
Robbi Sommers Bryant - http://www.robbibryant.blogspot.com (link to this month's post)

I'm participating in the August Blog chain at AbsoluteWrite. The prompt is: If you had to pick one color, and one color only, for an aspect of your writing, which one would it be and why?

The color I would pick is hazel, as it appears as in eye color.

Why? Hazel is something all its own, that is hard to describe in exact terms because different people have different opinions of it. Like my writing, it's hard to put into any one category. If hazel was green or brown, it would be called green or brown. But it can be both simultaneously, or neither. It has to have its own name. Hazel.


I also chose hazel because of the connection to eye color and eyes. Eyes, the window to the soul. Everything I write is a reflection of myself in some way. My characters all have a piece of me, good or bad, big or small, common or unique. Each plot and the way I write reflects who I am and life experiences, small truths twisted into metaphors or mostly fantastic scenarios. A blend of reality and the surreal. Like a blend of colors. Like hazel.


Other August Color Bloggers!
Aheïla: and direct link to her post
Ralph_Pines: and direct link to her post
AuburnAssassin: and direct link to her post
semmie: and direct link to her post
Anarchicq: and direct link to her post
CScottMorris: and direct link to his post
PASeasholtz: and direct link to his post
LadyMage: and direct link to her post
orion_mk3: and direct link to his post
DavidZahir: and direct link to his post
aimeelaine: and direct link to her post
FreshHell: and direct link to her post
sbclark: and direct link to her post
Bettedra: and direct link to her post
Guardian: and direct link to her post (YOU ARE HERE!)
M.R.J. Le Blanc: http://libraryofandunien.blogspot.com/
Alpha_Echo: http://writersramblings81.blogspot.com/
laffarsmith: http://www.craftingfiction.com/